Gagged and tied up – Time for bondage!

Generally, bondage is seen as a symbol of oppression. Is bondage still contemporary in times of #metoo and discrimination?

Sadomasochists are the last romantics. Bondage is an expression of my hands, an extension, a touch, a part of me. For me, the rope stands for closeness and hold, an expression of holding and warming the beloved partner. People are mostly naked, but they only start to freeze when you untie them – when you let them go. My workshops are not called “Embraced and held by ropes” for nothing.

Now that sounds a bit like a petting zoo …

My models are not bunnies, but always strong women who also like to call themselves “bitches” – they like to play just as much as I do. They like to fight, provoke, make nonsense, try to trick me. Women who have to be tough in everyday life and want to completely give up their responsibility in bondage are wrong with me. My game takes place at eye level. Women like that because they know that the grimness doesn’t take anything away from their dominance. I don’t have to belittle anyone, I don’t need to. Nicole is absolutely equal. And anything but helpless.

Beating and tying up – do you always have to do that or can you do without it?

It’s not like we’re always screwing. Of course we also have normal, a little rough sex – without restraints and spanking. And sometimes we just want to cuddle and massage. I’m not the youngest anymore.

In Japanese bondage, the partner is not only tied up, but also hung under the ceiling. How long do you want to keep this up?

I definitely want to celebrate 25 years on stage with Nicole, that’s eight more years. I take care of myself, enough exercise. Strength and endurance are absolutely necessary for the exercises.

You tell the story of your relationship on stage. It often involves teasing each other. Aren’t you sometimes tired or in a bad mood?

Yes, then the whole thing goes more quietly. We usually start with a standard figure: ropes around the waist, rope around the ankle, foot up – and she’s already hanging upside down. How we continue then depends on the mood. We have everything from romance to brutal messes to pain in our program. When Nicole is in a riotous mood, things can get rough. Then she supports herself with her leg and gyrates so that she can chase me. Or she steals the rope from me and hangs herself. She can do a solo performance. The goal is always clear: “Remember, I want to have fun!”

It almost looks caring when you tie Nicole up. Do you show affection by tying her up?

Yes, then I’m completely with the person. And if I get rough, it’s because I want to feel intensity. For me, good tying up is Zen: letting things happen with mindfulness, without wanting to go anywhere.

What do you mean by love?

Something like our constellation of three. It works so well because everyone is happy when the other person is doing well. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a cozy evening at home or because I’m sleeping with Nicole or Andrea has met a friend. For me, this mutual joy has to do with love. And trust. I can rely on that: If something is wrong, I have my two wives to support me. And I them.